Resources

Ideas to Read and Pass Along

Kevin & Jackie Freiberg

Your Choices Matter

Your most valuable Asset is NOT your Talent!

Your most valuable asset is your freedom to choose! Leadership is not a title or a position, it is a choice—an act of passion, purpose and influence that will ultimately set you free and help you take charge of your life. Your boss, your team, your colleagues, your neighbor, your spouse, your kids, your coach, your dog (you get it), are not responsible for you and your place in life—YOU are!

Your happiness, job satisfaction, sense of accomplishment, ability to make a difference and your ultimate success depends upon you, not THEM! There is no “them”—only you. We tell our three children: you may not like your teacher, you may not like your coach, your friends won’t always be nice—so don’t let any of them determine how you feel and act each day. Don’t try to change them, change your expectations of them. How about you? Are you dealing with a challenging boss, a difficult employee? Have any of your kids been coached by a coach who needs to be coached? Quit wasting time, energy and your life trying to change others. Take charge of your life by changing your attitude, expectations and actions toward THEM.

YOU! are the one thing you ultimately control.

You control your attitude and your attitude determines:
  • the perception you have of work (positive and hopeful or negative and cynical)
  • the way you see the world
  • the degree of peace and joy you have in your marriage
  • the intimacy you have with your children
  • the quality of your friendships
  • the success of your business
  • the reputation you build among colleagues, friends and your community
  • the happiness and fulfillment you experience in life
  • your perception of the quality of your life
  • how you will ultimately be remembered.

And guess what? Your CHOICES determine your attitude.

YOU get to choose how you wake up in the morning. YOU get to choose who you hang out with everyday. YOU get to choose how you spend your time, money and talent. YOU get to choose how you talk to yourself—and others. And YOU get to choose how you will respond to everyone and everything that comes into your life. YOU alone are responsible for how your life turns out.

The day you OWN IT is the day you will BREAK FREE and TAKE CHARGE of your life.

Few things are more precious to us than FREEDOM. The freedom to choose is what makes us human; it’s what separates us from all other animals. Everyone has the freedom to make choices, but people who are unhappy, and who allow themselves to be victimized, don’t know they have a choice.

NO FREEDOM = the false belief that you have no choice.

Almost every form of UNhappiness can be traced to a perceived lack of FREEDOM. So, if you want to be happier, create more freedom. If you want more freedom, expand your options and create more choices.

MORE CHOICE = MORE FREEDOM

The fewer CHOICES you perceive you have, the more “cornered” or trapped you feel. This causes fear, anxiety, apathy, depression and learned helplessness. When this happens hopelessness sets in, and without HOPE you have nothing. You become paralyzed! At this point, many people give up and quit—they become DEAD PEOPLE WORKING.

NO CHOICE = NO HOPE

Let’s say you are confronted with an opportunity to point out a fatal flaw in your organization that happens to be a sacred cow. The more choices you feel you have, the more risk you are willing to take. If you know that your skills are marketable elsewhere or if you’ve been thinking about starting your own business, you know you have options. These options can be empowering. Having more choices equates to less fear and more freedom to tell it like it is. Choice is power.

CHOICE = POWER!

People who know joy, peace and happiness aren’t simply the lucky ones among us. They are the ones who embrace their FREEDOM to choose. They look for possibilities and options and usually find them. These players don’t put their joy and well-being in the hands of others. They don’t wait passively for their spouses, parents, children, friends, CEOs or co-workers to make them happy. They choose to be proactive—writing their own scripts, forging their own destinies and creating their own happiness. This is what makes them INDISPENSABLE!

CHOICE = FEEL GOOD!

Choices are intrinsically motivating. You are happiest when you are calling the shots, when you become the cause and not just the effect. Deep down you are happiest when:

  • You have autonomy
  • You feel competent
  • Your life is congruent—you live the deep-seated values you espouse

CHOICE = ULTIMATE EXPRESSION OF FREE WILL!

Warning!

While choice is the expression of free will, not all choices lead to freedom. The choices you freely make could make you a slave and imprison you if they aren’t anchored in wisdom.

WISE CHOICES = ULTIMATE FREEDOM!

One of the best gifts you can give your colleagues, your friends, your children and your self is a consistent reminder of our freedom to CHOOSE!